Friday, February 1, 2013

How Often You Do Like This Knowingly Or Unknowingly ?

Today I thought of writing about some observations that I have noticed in some of my friends and acquaintances around me.

These observations became noticeable to me because of the marked negativity or ill feelings that perpetuate slowly and silently.

Those around me too might have observed such negative attitudes in me too on various occasions.

Normally we avoid talking about such negative qualities in people around us lest it might create an ill feeling in those who are otherwise close to us. And we do not want such a thing to happen.

But we should also appreciate the fact that unless there are some feed backs about things that we do not like, it may not be possible for those who exhibit such negative attitudes to get a chance to introspect about it and possibly make an effort to correct it. 

I have trained myself to appreciate people who give me such feed backs directly to me. But unfortunately there are very few people who tell me what they did not like in me except perhaps my wife.

But I also know that a good majority of people cannot face criticisms. Perhaps that is the reason that many people shy away from giving direct feed backs about some attitudes that they find in their friends.

Again it is not possible for us to attempt telling about the negative qualities of people who are superior to us or wield some influence or position in the society.

Such people most likely would not take criticisms lightly and on the other hand might turn out to become our enemies the moment we try something to correct them.

Now all these happen because we are all very conscious of our self importance.

And that makes us all egoistic of varying degrees.

When our self becomes more important for us, we start degrading ourselves in mind progress.

Often the highest ego or self importance is felt and exhibited by people having the least mind development.

And such an ego destroys the mind as it works as a mind poison.

I know a friend who tries to become very busy in his office when some of his friends happen to visit him there. Instead of finding some time to talk to his friend who visited him, he would suddenly become too busy with his phones and files that the person who visited him has to make an exit without talking to him.

There is another friend who tries to avoid his close friends if he is in a group of people !

Another one becomes very friendly when he has some special interest and at other times behaves as if he is a total stranger.

Yet there is another colleague who tries to make things complicated for his office colleagues so that he gains special attention.

And here is another one who will tell all kind of excuses to help a friend or colleague when such a help he could easily do without violating any rules.

Now what about this one ? He will not agree with your suggestion or opinion and support you even when he knows what you have suggested is the best option.

There are others who are very willing to seek and take some help from you, but will never do such a thing when a time comes for reciprocation.

There are some friends who tries to tarnish your image and reputation by working behind you in a secret manner while acting as your best friend openly.

We have all experienced this kind of things in our lives and we also do such things knowingly or unknowingly.

When self becomes the overriding thing in life, such things do happen.

And the same self importance make us too individualistic and force us to forget about our fellow beings. The same self importance of our fellow beings make them forget about us.

The more we try to project ourselves the more we downgrade ourselves before God.

Because selfishness and pride are those two things that make us depart from God the most.

These two are the root causes of all sins in this world !

Let me also reproduce some statements from my favorite guide book in this context :

When we are tempted to magnify our self-importance, if we stop to contemplate the infinity of the greatness and grandeur of our Makers, our own self-glorification becomes sublimely ridiculous, even verging on the humorous. One of the functions of humor is to help all of us take ourselves less seriously. Humor is the divine antidote for exaltation of ego. 

Brotherhood is impossible on a world whose inhabitants are so primitive that they fail to recognize the folly of unmitigated selfishness.

Unbridled self-will and unregulated self-expression equal unmitigated selfishness, the acme of ungodliness.

Of all the dangers which beset man’s mortal nature and jeopardize his spiritual integrity, pride is the greatest.

Pride is deceitful, intoxicating, and sin-breeding whether found in an individual, a group, a race, or a nation. It is literally true, “Pride goes before a fall.”

Pride obscures God. If you would obtain heavenly help, put away your pride; every hair of pride shuts off saving light, as it were, by a great cloud.

“Fear is man’s chief enslaver and pride his great weakness; will you betray yourself into bondage to both of these destroyers of joy and liberty?”

"How deceitful is the intellectual pride that precedes the spiritual downfall!"

I am willfully making efforts to come out of my pride, selfishness and ego. I do experience joy and liberty now becoming more and more predominant in me.

Would you also like to make an effort in this direction ?

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