To really appreciate the beauty of harmony and peace you should taste the bitter ugliness of chaos caused by being in disharmony and tensions.
To some people the smooth sweetness of the ice cream is better felt good after a hot spicy meal !
But is it necessary to fight a war always to enjoy peace ?
Have you ever thought of enjoying a life fully in love, harmony and peace always in this earth ?
In my humble opinion a single man or a single woman cannot be the agents of peace and harmony always, because they are charged particles of life ! Of course they can make willful attempts of smoothening their charges and move around in apparent peace. But for natural peace of mind they need to be in the companionship of a complementary individual who is capable of making their charges at equilibrium and peace.
A man and a woman are designed for living as complementary pairs or complementary companions.
Alone a man or woman is not complete. Once paired up they are complete and should work in peaceful equilibrium, living together, moving together and working together.
In that complementary situation they make the most desirable human state of existence.
The loving family unit comes in to existence if they behave to work as complements to each other as a joined pair and not as repulsive individuals forcefully tied up.
As individuals they are different and charged with individual characteristics that seem at odds.
But when they become a couple of husband and wife, the opposing forces should complement and reinforce each other making a bonded pair stronger than the individuals forming the couple.
If the paired individuals learn to discard their individual traits for their new existence as a paired couple, they can enjoy perpetual peace and joy.
The family formed by such couples would make small units of heaven on earth.
There is no question of family discords !
That is the way a civilized man and woman should behave once united as a married couple.
However, for uncivilized human beings who come under the category of barbarians this principle is not applicable.
Because peace , harmony and beauty can only be enjoyed by civilized individuals !
Barbarians perhaps enjoy fights, chaos and filth ! They only know whether they enjoy it or not !
To live as a couple in peaceful equilibrium under loving bondage always, the husband and wife should learn to forgo their individuals characteristics for a more enjoyable paired existence.
The husband should agree with the wife for all matters even when his individual feeling is otherwise.
The wife should agree with the husband for all matters even when her individual feeling is otherwise.
The husband should learn that the wife is prime in his life than all his other relations like his father, mother, brothers or sisters.
Likewise the wife should learn that the husband is prime in her life than all her other relations like her father, mother, brother or sisters.
For this pair even their child or children should be second only to the husband or the wife.
But once they practise it this way, surprisingly all others connected and related to them find them more desirable and loving than either the husband or the wife taken individually.
Then they become the way God wanted them to be !
For God prefers those who are peace makers and those who know peaceful co-existence.
Husband and wife couples in loving bondage and complementary companionships forming the fundamental units of the family are the greatest achievement of any civilized society or nation.
Such couples ensure fortunate families with happy children.
Such couples ensure that their children also make ideal couples when they grow up.
Such couples would also ensure that they are never old parasites for their grown up and coupled children.
Old age is the time for them to be mutually complementary for preparing themselves for the future complementary companionship beyond their material existence !
The life is much enjoyable and heavenly here on this earth if you know how to live it !
Longing for individual freedom and independence is not the solution. It is the method adopted by either spineless cowards or rebellious egoists in uncivilized groups exhibiting beastly or barbarian natures.
I would only say this: living in complementary companionship as husband and wife pair is a wonderful experience.
You can experience a heavenly life here in earth itself if you learn how to live like that.
That is my simple advice to all tensioned couples thinking of other options or live in a state of war and peace !
'The husband should agree with the wife for all matters even when his individual feeling is otherwise.
ReplyDeleteThe wife should agree with the husband for all matters even when her individual feeling is otherwise.'
Sounds too much of theory. Do you believe this will work and if this happens, don't you think it will kill both of them, no individuality, no personality left, on the contrary, such submissions can be very harmful for the family as a whole. What is important, is that agreement or disagreement should be followed by a healthy and matured discussion keeping aside the individuals' ego.
And I believe that 'Such couples ensure more fortunate families with more happy children.
and
Such couples ensure that their children also make ideal couples when they grow up.'
What do you say ?
I agree with you, Asthana. But the point I made, though appearing as 'theory' as you wrote, is to drive home the need for the husband and wife pair to learn to agree to each other to live in peaceful and complementary co-existence. Once they learn that by a willful and conscious training of their minds and attitudes, dwarfing their individualistic egos, then slowly they will realize that there are not much left to argue each other to 'win' over the other. The success and joy of each one of the pair is applicable to the pair and not to the individuals of the pair.
ReplyDeleteI think you got the point.
yes, got it ...
Delete